Zach Cregger, of Weapons and Barbarian fame returns in this reboot to the Resident Evil film franchise. A gory, disturbing, and well-constructed film, Resident Evil delivers in both spook, atmosphere, tension, and jumpscares.
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God, what a gross, boring way to begin a movie review. This is what I get for publishing three reviews in a week. Spoiler alert: I’m doing it again next week.
Truth be told, what else is there to say, other than what was in my intro? Resident Evil was a sound movie. It was full of tension and used jumpscares pretty well. It got me like three times. That’s right, pussies. I’m not too macho to admit I got scared! I’m a feminist!
The movie really lived up to the title and felt truly evil in a lot of senses. It didn’t shy away from really disturbing imagery, and built a tension-filled environment that never, ever let up. So if the tension didn’t get you, or if the jumpscares didn’t get you, then the gore sure will. Lots of gore. Lots of flying limbs and dismembered people and guts and blood and blown off heads and decapitations and stomachs with teeth consuming people while they’re kicking and screaming, and monsters made of flesh.
If you’re boring and unimaginative and can’t examine things in a vacuum, then fine, I’ll compare this movie to Cregger’s other movies. I’d say that, compared to Cregger’s last two outings, Resident Evil wasn’t as creative or thoughtful. It’s hard to top analogies for gun violence in school or stranger danger or sexism, but Resident Evil doesn’t need or have room for such things. There’s a chance that there’s a deeper message involved, but ah well. It was a perfectly serviceable and entertaining film.
Now, let us compare Cregger’s Resident Evil to Paul W. S. “I love my wife” Anderson’s Resident Evil franchise, starring Milla “My husband loves me” Jovovich.
Those movies SUUUUUUCKKKED. Those movies were just superhero fantasies where Milla “My husband likes to watch me kick butt” Jovovich that apparently didn’t stick to the source material at all. Apparently, Paul W. S. “It’s hot watching my wife be a badass” Anderson had a vision inspired by the video games, and decided to do his own thing. But those movies weren’t scary or inventive or even coherent.
Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
In all, I think Cregger’s Resident Evil was a fantastic movie because it stuck to its principles, lured us in with drawn-out scenes of calm, kicks of well-placed and personable humor, and then dug into us with horror of many varieties. Further, Cregger decided to draw out the story with a singular quest: get the item from point A to point B, and fill the journey with obstacles that directly underlined the importance of achieving the goal- and then tear things away at the last second. I felt like Resident Evil had the best, most earned tragic ending.
Now, there’s no reason why this movie should be docked in any way if we start at a 10/10 type rating, but my YMMV rating system involves an aspect of “are there people who wouldn’t enjoy this movie”, and truth be told, the only people who would be… people who aren’t horror fans? People who don’t like gore? I don’t know. Someone convince me why this movie should be rated
GOOD
I saw Resident Evil in theaters. In IMAX. There’s a chance I’m going to rewatch it not in IMAX so I can talk about why IMAX is a scam. Dunno. The Odyssey has me shaking my fist at the clouds these days.
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