Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard

I hated this movie. It was so forced and plastic and loud. So loud.  Boom People worship Cartoon Network. They love crap like Ed Edd and Eddy and Chowder and Flapjack. Look. You’re not wrong for liking what you like and I adore the fact that people my age have a different favorite show than... Continue Reading →

Army of the Dead

The last time I cared about a zombie-based media was the final season of Game of Thrones, where the big bad guy gets nerfed by a random little girl hiding in a tree. Before that was The Walking Dead, which is apparently still… on air? Snyder’s Army of the Dead is the first time I... Continue Reading →

Mortal Kombat (2021)

This movie is a ton of goofy fun. It’s based on a video game series that revolves around fighting and very gory kill scenes and cheesy catch phrases and it does not give a fuck about you or your grandma.  Given that this movie was made to bring the game to a different entertainment medium,... Continue Reading →

Prospect

The movie is an ambitious attempt at capturing a classic tale from yesteryear, in the context of a realistic sci-fi environment. It’s a cowboy story that would have been happy with John Wayne and some natives in the Wild West. It’s True Grit if the dad died in the first act. I hit play on... Continue Reading →

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